|"You won't be needing THIS!"|
Giving into my light work-load these past few days, I’ve decided to do ANOTHER blog. Not about resolutions or an update on my “no drinking January” (although I’m doing well!), but instead about THE BIG BREAK-UP. I haven’t talked openly about this; with the exception of telling some girlfriends, but it REALLY is called a Break-up because its exactly that…Broken.
I’ve always had the same attitude of other peoples relations, being that no one else is in that relationship except those 2 people…NO ONE. No one REALLY knows what goes on behind closed doors with other couples. UNLESS you’re an open book…which, anyone who knows me, knows I am VERY private because frankly, my relationship is no one else’s business. For example, you have a friend who tells you something shitty her bf did; the next time you see said boyfriend, that’s ALL you think about! THUS the reason I don’t talk about my relationships.
Now I’m not going to sit here and tell the whole storey about what happened between him and I, but I will let you know, I thought about it for over a year. My head was constantly filled with questions; “is he the one?” “am I SURE this is what I want”..”What if I do it and realize I made the biggest mistake of my life?”. That last question haunted me for a year, but like I always say, Life is short and sometimes you just have to take a chance. And I went forth with my “chance taking” and ended up meeting someone unbelievably amazing and completely unexpected.
Now, details aside, what I did was completely inexcusable and NO ONE deserves that. I can never take back what I did and I have to live with that every day. I have to live with the fact that I literally ripped the heart out (and played basketball with for a bit..) of the person who loved me more than anything…and loved me more that I deserved. Many people seem to think I am just a heartless bitch who could care less about what I did. The real reality of it: There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about it. I know that will lessen with time, and as he moves on the better his life will become too, hopefully. I am sincere in the fact that I hope he has an amazing life. We had a great relationship the past 7 years and I’ll always have those memories. He was also a great man-friend and anyone who knew him can attest to that…well being a great friend…not man-friend, lets clear that up ha-ha. He will be amazing for the right girl and he deserves someone incredible, truly.
On the lighter side, I will finish off with this. I have never been so incredibly happy in my life. Everything kind of fell together as It should, and I have no regrets…NONE. Quoted by Drake: “The best relationships, are the ones you never expect to be in..”.
Love, Laura xoxox