Thursday, June 6, 2013

My Drunk Blog..(short and sweet..)

So I'm into the vodka..sitting in bed, other half is having a chit-chat with an old friend, and it's about 8:30..give er' take..

I decide to blog..about what you might ask? I have no idea..the bitch writing this is drunk. But seriously though, I do have an idea for this blog..lets see if I find it along the way. But first a sip from my secret lover...mmm OK where was I..OH! I found it! My idea was about walls..and why we put them up. Anyone who has had the enormous pleasure of getting to REALLY know me, knows I have a huge heart. In extremely sensitive, caring, romantic, over-thinker and constantly have a million things on my mind. But on the outside, (and to people are not close to me..yet..) I seem cold, thoughtless and I come across as very aggressive and arrogant. My arrogance has always been my best defense mechanism..that, and sarcasm. I've used it too keep people as a safe distance..for fear of them getting to know me, and hating me. THAT, is a truth I've never said out loud (or you've read.. In your mind).

Having said all that, WHY, my reader, do we put there walls up? To see who cares enough to knock them down? To never feel vulnerable? There is SO many beautiful things that we hide away out of fear..but it's the beautiful things that make us who we are..and the reason why people love us SO much. Why can't we let them in? For me..I fear judgment and rejection. I like to feel like I always have the upper hand and am one tough bitch (which I am), but sometimes I get tired of that. Sometimes I just want to take that mask off and be real. Cry, show my battle scars, and not worry about one.damn.thing.

Ah well, that's enough vodka-talk for one night. On the flip side, you ever want to REALLY get to know me? Drink with me, and I promise to tell you EVERYTHING...just ask my co-workers. Screaming "sometimes you just want to fuck, you know what I mean?" While your drinking with them, can and WILL follow you through the rest of your career...(I was in the midst of a break up, OK? and drinking straight vodka..) keep that in mind and learn from your pal, Laura.


Love, laura xoxox


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